How much does culture affect a family? Each family is different, even families from the same town, in the same state, of the same ethnicity. Of course, each person is unique, meaning that each family will be unique. Though each family unit can be different from their neighbors, there is a general culture that surrounds each town, in different countries. We all know about the different types of cultures that exist, but what happens to the family when that culture is changed? I would like to share, essentially, the pros and cons a change in culture can have on a family.
To start off, I would like to mention the huge cultural change an immigrant family goes through and how that might alter the family dynamics. A study was done in North Carolina following ten different immigrant families from Mexico (https://www.jstor.org/stable/4541647). For the most part, the parents of each family wanted their children to have a better future, which would be achieved by gaining a US education and learning English. After the move, however, relationships were altered and for some the end goal of moving back to Mexico may have changed as well. To move the whole family from Mexico often took three years. The father would usually leave first, who would bring the rest of his family years later. This time gap typically decreased the quality of relationship between the father and the rest of the family. This is just one con from this change in culture, or rather in the process of changing cultures. Once in the states, the families would learn English which the kids picked up faster than the adults. Instead of relying on the adults for communication, the adults would have to rely on the kids. This could either be a pro or a con depending on the perspective. The children typically stayed loyal to their families, and this would strengthen that, but it might also be embarrassing to rely on their child so much. The family that moved to the States also most likely left behind extended family, which was a huge support in Mexico. The children often missed their extended family so much they felt lonely and depressed. This is why the immigrant families would still celebrate cultural rituals, which led to a greater feeling of loyalty to each other. These families, while struggling, are not less than the other families around them, they just are getting used to the cultural changes required to achieve their goals of a better future.
While there are so many other changes that may happen when a family changes culture by moving to a different country, I want to take some time to focus on what might happen to a family that just moves from one state to another, within the US. I feel like a few more people might be able to relate to this cultural change a little more. I would like to share some experiences I had from moving around different states. When I was six, my family left the place that had been home for my ancestors for 120 plus years. We moved eight hours away from the rest of my extended family, which was hard on all of us. Two years later, we moved again, this time about two hours from homes. Three years after that, we again moved eight away hours from extended family. Finally, we made one more move that again led us to live two hours away from most of our extended family. Each move became slightly easier than the one previously, I think because our family system was getting used to the changes.
Each individual may have suffered in slightly different ways, but essentially we all pulled through. Now, our family is well bonded. We don't rely on constant extended family support. I feel like we all became slightly more self-reliant. Each person in the family would have to get used to making new friends, get used to new schools and just dealing with a lot of "newness." Depending on how we reacted to the new things, we were either strengthened or weakened. I've gained and lost so many friends, I've started and stopped different sports, and I've had to deal with lots of other changes, but one thing has remained constant in my life; my family.
While we don't go through the drastic changes immigrant families go through we still had to get used to differences in with each town we moved to. We are not better than other families around us, nor are they better than us. We just simply have had different experiences that taught us different lessons. The same constant can apply to all families if they look at and deal with different challenges with the right mindset. Those immigrant families could give up, and many do, but that lessens the chances of achieving their goals. With the right mindset, any family could go through any cultural change and become stronger from it.
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